I am about to lose it. My sanity (what's left of it), my hair (from pulling it out), my teeth (from grinding).And why?
It's all down to DRILLING.
It's hard enough to write well without the consistently jarring noise of the DRILL across the courtyard. Given the gaping holes where glass once was, the builders appear to be replacing the windows.
Now, if this was a normal neighbourhood with normal houses, the whole process probably wouldn't have taken more than a week. But since this is a neighbourhood with freakin' millionaires who live in their freakin' millionaire houses with freakin' millions of windows, of course it's taken almost two months -- and counting.
I don't have anything against the builders themselves. I can take their burping, their shouting, the ABBA music they listen to, and even their very resonant farts. I just can't take the BL**DY DRILL!
So, I ask you. What should I do to stop the DRILL?
A. Take them cups of tea and ask them sweetly to cease and desist.
B. Flash them from my window and stun them into silence.
C. Using sorcery, arrange for a constant cloud-burst overhead so they can't work outside. 'Cause I can do that, of course.
Together, we can rid the world of DRILLS. Because a world with DRILLS is a world where I'm going FREAKIN' CRAZY!
I love how all of your solutions are peaceful.
ReplyDeleteIf you can do option C then you could magically finish the work for them. ; j
I expect options A and B would be counter productive. : /
Well, I don't want to harm the builders. I just want to harm the DRILLS!
ReplyDeleteOoh yes, good point about C.
Option B made me laugh, so that's where my vote lies!! :)
ReplyDeleteMy vote lies with option B too, but then they may want to 'salute' you back. So you would have to be prepared for reactions besides a moment of peace! Let us know how it goes, whatever option you choose!
ReplyDeleteOh, Talli. I was just reading about your drill problems on Twitter.
ReplyDeleteMy suggestion is to use all three. Flash them into stunned silence (best to do this now before you become a rich and successful novelist, as there maybe Daily Mail types hiding in bushes to takes pictures). Then take them a "magical" cup of tea that sends them into an eternal sleep.
Hm. Maybe put up a large sign. Quiet Zone - Writer at Work!
ReplyDeleteI think all are viable choices--especially if used in combination.
ReplyDeleteMay peace and quiet reign the neighborhood. :)
steal the drill when they are not looking lol
ReplyDeleteHeadphones and loud music?
ReplyDeleteThe problem with A and B is that it might stop them temporarily, but they are going to have to get the windows in EVENTUALLY, so it just delays the inevitable.
If you have a laptop, it's time for you to go mobile...and get away from the drills.
I knew it! I always knew you had magic powers! So C. Definitely C!
ReplyDeleteI do have magic powers but I only like to trot them out ocasionally so as not to make others around me feel inferior. But I think this situations calls for their use! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks everyone for weighing in!
Temporary options all of them. Invest in a set of ear plugs :(
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteSerisously, is it the sound of drilling or ABBA that is most annoying?
ReplyDeleteEither way, I say sorcery...
Have you considered and Electro Magnetic Pulse?
ReplyDeleteLindy Lou - thanks for the suggestion; I've tried earplugs but the drilling is so loud I can hear it through them!
ReplyDeleteMatthew - hunh?
Oh, I would hate that! My guess is the guys drilling aren't there by choice; maybe you could talk to the people who hired them? Or maybe you could find another place to write, like a cafe or a library? That's why I often have to do, especially during the summer.
ReplyDeleteAll three options made me laugh! Maybe you could write drilling into your story, you know, go for the whole organic, method-writing thing. :)
ReplyDeleteI would definitely go for sorcery, a bit of black magic is the only cure for builders noise.
ReplyDeleteIf it works can you send me the spell so I can rid my neighbourhood of constant barking dogs.
This is comparative to my a-hole barking dog next door and the only solution I've found is to stress out, scream, curse and cry. It solves nothing, really, but it's all I've got.
ReplyDeleteWell, you can't flash them forever, and they're bound to keep drilling even after the thrill is gone. You don't want caffeinated drilling, that might be dangerous. So I'd go for the sorcery.
ReplyDeleteYou'll have to get ear plugs! Construction drives me insane and I always throw the workers bad looks, even though I know it's not their fault.
ReplyDeleteGood luck!
Do you use a laptop? If so, flee to the nearest coffeehouse.
ReplyDeleteAargh--that type of grating noise makes me grind my teeth, especially when I'm struggling with my words. Do you have headphones? Maybe the sound of the ocean to cover? And I agree with Alesa--flashing them would make them SLOW DOWN in hopes of another flash!
ReplyDeleteOh Talli darl'n I can send a Royal Court member to scream "Off with their heads!" Though it could get messy....oh and you don't want to harm the builders..hmmm...perhaps we could put you in a bubble. Yeah, a bubble, sound proof, pleasant and just for you! ;o)
ReplyDeleteVisit My Kingdom Anytime
Headphones? Earplugs?
ReplyDeleteI was revising for exams last year when our neighbours decided to knock down the enormous red wall linking our two properties and replace it with a brand new one. It is fair to say that I went slightly mad and the builders were hammering all bl**dy day. In the end I took my work to the library. It was either that or lose my mind completely. That is probably not very helpful, but rest assured I can relate!
ReplyDeleteOh no. That sounds horrible. Could you sneak over under cover of night and sabotge the drills by removing something vital from them?
ReplyDeleteEarplugs and noise blocking headphones! The girls who live in the apartment below me (my apartment is actually an old house, so I have the upper floor and they have the lower floor and let me tell you the walls and floors are NOT very thick) play this loud music at all hours, and it's so annoying. Sometimes the headphones help, depending on volume.
ReplyDeleteOr you could... get really drunk?
Wanna borrow my secret EMP handheld weapon? Guaranteed success...
ReplyDeleteB. All the way.
ReplyDeleteWhy not have an Abba Karaoke??? That ought to stop anyone's drilling!!
ReplyDelete:-)
But seriously!! I hope they stop soon - you're an artist darn it!!!
Take care
x
Talli,
ReplyDeleteThe drill is 1 of the most annoying noises ever invented. If technical people can come up w/ cellphones that do everything from take pictures to serve as GPS systems, then why doesn't someone invent a silent drill? Or an almost silent drill?
Maybe 1 of your readers has the answer -- or will invent such a device! :)
Ooo, I like that. A silent drill. And while they're at it, a silent saw. It may be the next most annoying sound.
ReplyDeleteI hope your drillers vacate soon!
~that rebel
Aaargh! Some idiot once booked me into a meeting room at work for something I was going to have to record, and some builders were directly outside running their drill all morning.... could have gone outside and walloped them! But human resources probably don't look very kindly on that.
ReplyDeleteIf you can get close enough, I say a marshmellow gun.
ReplyDeleteNice solutions! Have fun with them :)
ReplyDeleteI will mail you a BB gun and you can blast them with it and seriously have some wine and relax your mind. Because i have gone through that and i had no choice but to wait it out, so i resorted to drinking and cursing a little here and there finally they were gone.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely B! And make sure you videotape it so for instructional purposes. :)
ReplyDeleteI'll trade you my kids for the drill? I guess that sounds mean, I do love the buggers, but they've been on some wild-hair tangent lately and my nerves are shot.
ReplyDeleteIf you won't trade, I vote for option A...as long as it has a heavy sedative in it, LOL.
l live in a fairly new subdivision... for me it is the nails going into the roof as they lay down shingles. Argh!
ReplyDeleteI'd go with C. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteMason
Thoughts in Progress
I'd say go with "c." If you tell me what time your going to use your powers, I'll use mine at the same time and we will eliminate your noise problem together. (Cause that's how writers roll...) :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for commenting on my interview over at Jen's blog!
ReplyDeleteTry the flashing. better chances that way.
Haha, you are so sweet even when you're frustrated!! The tea might work? Is this supposed to be happening for a long time? I used to get incredibly irritated with drilling outside my apartment but it was for temporary construction so that provided some sanity.
ReplyDeleteHi Talli .. I suspect - pick up the laptop .. head to the park, or back to Greenwich .. each day & avoid the drills altogether .. otherwise perhaps you'll be grinding your teeth ... ?
ReplyDeleteNot helpful I know .. noise is so irritating and drills are just terrible .. another thing - you could go to Church and pray for the drillman .. he must be suffering?
Not helpful really .. I guess it'll pass?! Hope the weekend's more peaceful .. happy days - Hilary
Can you write to Kensington council and tell them that you are the most important millionaire on the block (like Jenny, only less rap) and insist the drillers stop between 12 - 2 each day? Failing that, I'd head out to somewhere nice with wifi. Incessant drilling is impossible to write through - kudos for keeping at it!
ReplyDeletecareful what you say, Talli - I'm married to one of *those* driller killers! (he's a carpenter - he HAS to)
ReplyDeletesolution: MUFF (of the ear variety)
I'd go for flashing them. Definitely. It always works (ahem, not that I would know or anything... :)) Flash them, stun them into silence, and then sneak out and break the drills.
ReplyDeletePoor blokes. They won't know what hit them.
Oh, and: hi! I'm back and about to try and catch up on your posts because I love them so much!
I think you know my answer without even asking. If flashing is among the options, that is ALWAYS my choice... Barring that though, is there a way to add some less annoying 'white noise' to your own place? A fan, maybe? The bathroom fan drowning out my children and husband is critical to me getting my writing done.
ReplyDeleteUse sorcery. If you've created a book out of thin air and gotten it published, you can do freakin' anything.
ReplyDeleteHey, I found you over on Olivia's blog. Congratulations on your publication! Can't wait to see how it turns out when "The Hating Game" hits the stands...I'll have to look back through your blog and see if I can get any tips on the publication process.
Down with drills. I prefer to get hammered.