Wednesday, June 08, 2011

Squirrels: The Next Big Thing in Publishing

I've got the inside track on a new trend in publishing: squirrels. First there was vampires, then dystopia, then Greek myths. Now, it's the secret lives of squirrels.

You know, all those things they get up to away from the human eye: shopping for new tails, eating mini-cupcakes, torrid love triangles... maybe even a little DIY. There's more than enough material for eighty-thousand words, and children and adults alike will flock to read about these vastly under-appreciated creatures.

But the novel I'm writing now has no squirrels, I hear you cry. Well, it's quite simple. Just take an existing query, and change out all the humans to squirrels. I'll give you an example, using the blurb of my new (now) squirrel-based novel, Watching Willow Watts.

For twenty-five-year-old squirrel Willow Watts, life has settled into a predictably dull routine: days behind the counter at her father's antique shop; nights watching fuzzy telly whilst the elderly squirrels of Britain's Ugliest Tree bed down for yet another early night. But everything changes when Willow's epically embarrassing Marilyn Monroe impersonation is uploaded to SquirrelTube. A canny squirrel spots Marilyn's ghostly image hidden in the film and Willow becomes an international sensation. Her dire little tree is suddenly overrun with fans proclaiming her to be the 'new Marilyn'. Egged on by fellow squirrels - whose shops and businesses are cashing in - Willow eagerly embraces her new identity, dying her fur platinum and scoffing nuts to achieve Marilyn's legendary curves. But when the only squirrel she has ever truly loved returns, seeking the old Willow, it's decision time. Should she risk stardom and the tree's new-found fortune on love? Or is being Marilyn Willow's real ticket to happiness?

See how easy that is? So be a part of publishing's next big thing. Bring on the squirrels!

61 comments:

  1. For some reason this post made me think of that advert with Mr. T. 'Snickers, gets some nuts!'...or maybe it's just me.

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  2. It's definitely original. I think you have something here!!!

    Just saw your novel on my bookshelf today and thought about how I couldn't wait for Willow's release day!!!

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  3. I can see this taking off. Squirrel of the Rings, Anita Blake: Squirrel Hunter, Squirrels of the Caribbean...

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  4. This is amazing! A while ago, I wrote this.

    http://www.marisabirns.com/2009/12/sassy-love.html

    Who knew I was on right track!

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  5. Now we know what to concentrate on next! How amusing.

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  6. Oh yes. The power of the squirrel is now revealed. Your readership will sure go nuts.

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  7. What a hoot! My WIP takes place on a luxury yacht....I now see squirrels basking on the party deck, sunglasses on, sipping cocktails!

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  8. So funny! And a little nutty :)

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  9. Now I know why the local squirrels keep trying to get in my flat - they want me to write their story.

    Move over Cosmic Seed, Cosmic Squirrels is the next big thing in science fiction!

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  10. Brilliant! Once I saw a blonde squirrel, and I thought it had a genetic defect, but now I see that it had just come back from the salon, and I was getting a glimpse into true squirrel life!

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  11. Awesome. Good thing I'm querying a squirrel novel right now. It's going to be a phenomenon. ;)

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  12. Hilarious! My father-in-law started a book on squirrels a couple of months ago.

    I gave you a sweet award, stop by to pick it up.

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  13. Of course! I can't believe I hadn't noticed the trend. I will have to make some changes to my WIP.

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  14. Such a tail you told! Got me going nuts wondering how it ends.

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  15. I like it!! It worked for Beatrix Potter;-)

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  16. LOL, thanks for the laugh--love the SquirrelTube bit. But it sounds like a great plot, even with humans! What a fun idea for a story. :) (And I assume that IS your real plotline?)

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  17. what's extra funny about this is that i could totally see this being a real trend

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  18. ROFL, I think your book is going to be made into a movie. They are having a casting call in my backyard. :)
    Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

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  19. This is genius in so many ways : )

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  20. Hehe! Thanks for popping by, everyone -- extra nuts for all! :)

    This really made me snicker while I was writing it. Wouldn't it be funny if, next year, the next big thing was squirrels? Ha!

    Carol, thank you! Yes, that is indeed my real plot. Sad to say the novel, in reality, is squirrel free.

    Happy Wednesday, everyone!

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  21. Love that story. Please continue.......! I want to know how it ends!

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  22. Sweet idea. I see vampire squirrels, zombie squirrels (all of those road kills come back to life and hunt down the owners of the vehicles) or just plain old rabid squirrels terrorizing a community. Yes, squirrel horror is the Next Big Thing...

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  23. Talli, I'll have a pint of whatever you're drinking :)

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  24. If a squirrel wanted to gain weight this squirrel would eat lots of Brazil nuts, pistachios & pecans.

    I love the concept of SquirrelTube, you really made me LOL!

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  25. The squirrels in my backyard have a school in which they teach all the other squirrels how to outfox our "squirrel-proof" bird feeder.

    I believe it. o_o

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  26. LOL! Yeah, I'm not seeing it happen. ;) Funny though, in my line of work we call people who investigate and withhold information from others 'secret squirrels' so I cracked up so much when I read this!

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  27. Across the planet, the word went out among the squirrel population.

    "At midnight we strike! The world is ours! Nothing can stop us!"

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  28. Haha definitely. I see squirrels becoming huge. Vampires? Pshaw. Squirrel-vampires, now THAT'S where the money is!

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  29. You joke, William, but my family squirrel just might be leading the charge.

    Maybe it's time for Sam to talk about her in his blog....

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  30. Very clever! This morning I went down a rabbit hole, perhaps I should have gone up the squirrel tree?

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  31. Way late, but it's the first thing that come to mind-- Talli, you nut. :)

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  32. The Wall Street Journal would be thrilled if YA had wholesome squirrels.

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  33. Can I introduce space squirrels?

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  34. Ha ha, you're so funny! I think the trailers for Paul's movies would be pretty entertaining...How about Squirrels Vs. Aliens?

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  35. LOL! Just watch you cause a bajillion people to write about squirrels in their posts. :P

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  36. Squizz got to you last Thursday and told you all about his plans for world domination starting with The Adventures of Squizzey coming to a Kindle near you later this year, didn't he? He is encourageable! :D

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  37. AND guinea pigs!! Bring back the guinea pigs!!!

    LOL!!

    Take care
    x

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  38. I adore squirrels.... we get many come into our garden. I saw a black one in Canada.

    Loved the blog very original
    Yvonne,

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  39. What a superb idea! At least for me, it's one of the most interesting subjects. Actually, I think you could describe the telephone book very interestingly :)

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  40. LOL!! That was awesome!!!!!! The story sounds great without squirrels too!

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  41. Talli, you're definately onto something! Those squirrels get up to allsort of humorous escapades I'm sure. There's one that comes in my back garden and chases the cat. There could well be some deep mysterious motive for such behaviour...
    And we are all fed up with vampires! Vampire squirrels though, that's another story!

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  42. Hi Talli .. those squirrels get around .. migrate as much as humans .. we've got a few of Willow's friends down here .. are they busy at this time of year ... but we are rain free .. one negative!

    Good thought for the bookshelves .. they could be made in trees too ...

    Cheers - but very windy .. Hilary

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  43. You are so clever. I'm really eager to read this new book. Willow is someone I'm going to love!

    You made a comment on Karen Walker's post. This is to tell you that my memoir IS on Kindle, and on the Nook. You're a busy gal, but if you get a chance to read it, I'd love to know what you think. I'm hoping, too, that readers will post a review on Amazon. As you know, they don't have to be long. The shorter the better, really.

    Cheers for your success with your second book. The blurb is a winner!
    Ann Best, Memoir Author

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  44. I feel this squirrel trend will be very bad for young people. How will they cope with the inappropriate nut crunching?

    mood
    Moody Writing
    @mooderino

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  45. LOL,ok I beat you to it but instead of squirrels I have trolls :)

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  46. Squirrels eating cupcakes = world domination through cuteness.

    Dangerous creatures they are!

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  47. Hmmm, I wonder if this will work on an article I've been working on?

    Thanks for the inside tip, chee,chee...squeek...chip, or whatever the hey squirrel's say.

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  48. 'The secret lives of squirrels' reminded me of this ridiculous TV show we have here called 'The Secret Life of the American Teenager'. Personally, I'd rather watch the squirrel version, so who knows, maybe it really would thrive. lol

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  49. What a kick! I can already imagine a movie being made: The Squirrels, filmed in Bodega Bay, where the characters notice the strange behavior of the squirrels in the area. (After all, would they BE in Bodega Bay?) At first, it's no more than a squirrel running across the beach and pecking (well, maybe sapping) at the heroine's head. Things take a truly ugly turn when hundreds of squirrels converge on a children's party.... Ah, what Hitchcock could have done witht he idea.

    But, I think you're onto something, Talli.

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  50. I didn't use a squirrel in my first novel... I was hoping to start a rabbit trend... LOL.

    Squirrels are cute though...

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  51. Hi Talli,

    Congratulations on the upcoming release, Watching Willow Watts!

    I like the title and the excerpt sounds interesting!

    All the best!

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  52. Very funny and original! A family of raccoons are living under my deck. Maybe you could add them to your squirrel screenplay, and we could ship them off. They'll work for leftovers. Julie

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  53. Okay, I'm in - I'm going back to my wip to change the humans to squirrels. :)

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  54. Talli - you're nuts.
    (See what I did there? adding in squirrelly words must count for something too!). We're coming down with squirrells here, good to know they're good for something!

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  55. As usual, I'm always a day late and a dollar short when it comes to trends. Dang.

    (Love the Willow Watts squirrel blurb!!)

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  56. Are you sure that's the way its going :)

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  57. Ok, here I am now waiting for the Squirrel version of Watership Down...

    Is there anything that Squirrels can't do?

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  58. Ah, those cheeky squirrels. I actually do have a few lines devoted to squirrels in my manuscript, as inspired by the ones in Brompton Cemetery that are so jaded, one actually approached me on the back of a bench and put its paw on my shoulder. Eek! Good thing there's no rabies in the UK...right??? :)

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Coffee and wine for all!