Happy Monday, everyone! If you're in North America, then I wish you a very restful Labo(u)r Day.
Today I am very pleased to welcome the very funny writer Lynda Renham, talking about her new book . . . and the contents of her handbag!
Take it away, Lynda.
I am so excited to be on Talli Roland's blog that at first I could think of nothing to talk about, and then I realised
it had to be handbags and Lady Gaga. What do the two have in common? Ah, read
on to find out.
Harriet, the heroine in my new novel ‘The
Valentine Present and Other Diabolical Liberties’ which is available now on
Amazon by the way, has a great deal of trouble opening her bag at a very
important moment. Harriet also owns a little pink Primark suitcase which she
uses for a very dodgy deal. But, read the book and you can enjoy her
adventure. Bels, the heroine in
‘Croissants and Jam’ empties her bag at the airport when she loses her boarding
pass and pulls out everything from a rented DVD to a pair of knickers. She
later leaves it sitting in the airport and doesn’t realise until she is many
miles away, that she no longer has it.
I’m not saying I do things like that, of
course not *tiny embarrassed cough* But I do have very interesting things in my
handbag and I can’t help wondering if your bag experiences match mine and
Harriet’s. In my handbag at the last
look I had three notepads. Well, an author can never have enough, right? There
is also an assortment of bills. Oh dear, I’d better check they’ve been paid. I
imagine if they have been stuck in my handbag it is unlikely, right?
My
Blackberry and a bottle of Flexall coupled with Biofreeze and I think there is
some Ralgex in there. Not that I’m a hypochondriac or anything. A pair of
glasses with both arms missing. Go figure. I’m attached to them what else can I
say? There is a crumpled cheesecake recipe, which I will make one day. A small
bag full of an assortment of pills, for headaches, diarrhoea, migraine,
irritable bowel and there are some anti-histamines. I stress I’m not a
hypochondriac. That reminds me I must book an appointment to get that pain in
my foot checked.
There’s my purse, covered in doctor appointment stickers. Not
that I’m a hypochondriac or anything. Have I already said that? Do you think I
protest too much? This is great but I can’t work out which is the next
appointment now. I really should remove some, except… they are well stuck and refuse
to be removed.
Oh, here is the best thing. My Lady Gaga CD which goes
everywhere, so if I have the opportunity to play it, then I will. I have three
combs. As you can see one is never enough for me. I believe in excess rather
than moderation. The shoulder strap for my handbag which I never use, but you
just don’t know do you? Better safe than sorry. Three pens, see what I mean?
Three tubes of 4orehead. One pair of knickers, as I’m not likely to need three
of them at any one time am I? Finally a pair of earrings, a tampon and a tin of
cat food.
Standard contents of a handbag, would you
agree? I’m sure you have far more
fascinating things in yours. I’m glad I did that actually. It has confirmed I’m
perfectly normal. Anyway must fly. I have a doctor’s appointment, not that I am
a hypochondriac or anything.
Enjoy ‘The Valentine Present and Other
Diabolical Liberties’ where handbags are mentioned- a bit.
Thanks, Lynda!
I don't think I could list the contents of my handbag even if I tried - each and every handbag I own operates like a black hole where things go in, never to be seen again.
What's in your handbag (or man-bag)?
